What is our focus?

Porch started in the middle of the night as I realized that I belonged to a culture that prized stuff over people...so that it didn't matter that the shop was in an ugly strip mall where you could never stop to chat. That your SUV pulls into your garage and you never even need to know your neighbour. Then you watch the news and learn about all the deviants in society and think they are your neighbours and you're glad you don't know them...and so it goes.

I knew KNOW instinctively that this is wrong...that there is a better way. Over the year we have connected with the simplicity movements and slow movements and learned so much about how to live.

But I'm afraid that Porch itself has suffered. I've learned tons, but has Porch? What IS it all about? It is a great title, a really promising magazine, but is it too much on the surface? to all over the map?

How to show people, gently, firmly, that there is a way to slow down without losing who you are? Or that, really, you can slow down and find who you are, and that this isn't a bad thing? That there is a lost art to knowing your neighbours that's worth rekindling?

How do we do this???

Living the Mission

I wonder if it is appropriate to ask for people's stories on how they have slowed down? And where to ask for that? I think it would be a great benefit to know that people are out there, living the slow life, day by day. Not changing the world, or I should say, changing the world by changing themselves. So far, we've been able to do it, but I for one would love the encouragement that would come from knowing other people are out there doing it too. And enjoying themselves while they're at it. I'll think about how to best get this started.

Direct Mail Pros and Cons how to tell people about our mission

We are seriously considering going the direct mail route for our print subscribers but are wondering (continually) if it is really in keeping with our message.

Will we be adding to people's already stressed, information overloaded lives if we drop a postcard in their mailboxes? Will it make a difference that the postcard is beautiful and the people we are choosing to send it to have been thoughtfully selected?

Or are we still junk mail?

And then again, what are our alternatives? I believe so strongly in the idea that we need to hear that we are social animals who NEED to connect to each other in meaninful ways. We need to be close to the people around us so that we KNOW, really know our neighbours, and know that 99% of them are good people. Different, but good. Maybe not all of them will become your best friend, but at least you will understand that love, not fear is what needs to drive our neighbourhoods and our lives. If we live in fear or hatred or simple disregard of our neighbours, we live in peril that our neighbourhoods will become like ghost towns...breeding crime, fear, hatred, lonliness, depression, etc.

So how do I reach people with this message?

A little about me and Porch

I have been trying to delete that last post for some time...which should tell you a couple of things. First, I was so embarrassed that I actually wrote what I wrote I haven't been able to write anything since. Second, I am a complete amateur to this whole idea of blogging.
I believe so strongly in the idea of Porch...that we desperately need a place---be it radio, print magazine or internet, where we can share information on how to be human...how to open our hearts and slow down. On the idea that it's about belonging, not belongings. On how to build healthy communities.
We are coming onto our first year, and we need to get the word out. I need to learn to shout a bit...really let people know how passionately I feel about Porch. And I think Porch itself needs to come out of its adolecence and really not be afraid to say who it is and what it stands for.
I am looking forward to the coming year. We're going to have to be warriors for healthy community, and we're going to have to really fighta bit, maybe, to make sure that we're heard.
I'm proud of our quiet approach, but maybe we've been too quiet, to subtle.

Except for that previous post...what was I thinking?

Take Care. Please let us know what you want to see in Porch, on the Web site, etc.

Opening of the Heart

One of the pillars on which Porch is balanced is the necessity of opening one's heart. It's a concept gorgeously dealt with by Beverly Boos at www.openingoftheheart.org. We feel blessed, honoured, lucky, inspired to have been able to show a bit about this great project in Porch, and to have learned a bit about Beverly and what her team is attempting to do. After having the chance to meet her and one of Opening of the Heart's partners, Andy Himes, I feel even more strongly that it is possible, for all of us, no matter what our stripes, to learn to listen to each other. The difficulty is, I think, in making this message a strong one. this is no polyanna effort: this is a real honest strong attempt at being true to ourselves. I hope it works.

Thoughts on "peer pressure"

After a discussion about peer pressure recently, I have had several chances to ponder the subject. On the one hand, one would think that, as social animals, peer pressure would be an important part of cohesion for us. Isn't it necessary to use the ideas and subtle pressure of others around us to help us form our opinions? Don't we do this every day, naturally? Why is peer pressure seen as such an inherently negative thing for our children? Are these "others" that we fear so much always negative? Will our kids unthinkingly be pressured into activities that are bad for them?

Theoretically, as someone who thinks that we are not islands unto ourselves and that we need other people, theoretically, I would expect peer pressure to be a good thing.

Of course this is not always true, practically speaking.

I want my children to grow up and be involved with other people. I want them to influence and be influenced by other people around them. I want them to be social animals. At the same time, I recognize that what they will decide to like and dislike is going to sometimes differ from what I like and dislike.

When that's broccoli or donuts, who cares. But when it's war and war games, well...

Where do we draw the line in families between who we are individually, and who we are as a family? Especially when the disagreement is so profound?

Okay, my son is only 7, so he's not a member of the NRA and he's not ready to join the Army or what have you. But it's starting to be an issue with me and it's beginning to be something that I can forsee as a problem on the horizon.

How does an ardent pacifist (me) live with someone who loves guns, war games and stuff like this?

In a larger context, how do we all live together with our differences? The ones that really matter to us? I don't have an answer for that, by the way. That's why (partly) I started Porch. But it's definitely something I'm wrestling with daily.

How do we as a society live together in an honest and open way, with compassion---even when we don't want to? That is to say, even when the issues are so utterly opposed AND dear to us?

No answers. No quick fixes. No "bake this pie, do 20 new and improved sit ups and wear this skirt and your problems will be solved" kind of solutions.

Porch Blog

"Blogging is like sitting on your front porch and waving to your neighbors as they walk by. You don't have to have a great dialog with each of them, but they will remember who you are and think of you when they need something, or be there to help out when they can.” Brandon Wirtz 

So, I figured I'd blog as well. I've been intrigued about the whole idea for about a year and a half now...just never really felt I had a reason. Now, with Porch having been out nearly a year, it seems fitting to comment on the process a bit and on various and sundry "belonging" oriented themes that cross my mind.

As we try to get Porch out into the world, and, at the same time, stay on our porch at home as much as possible, we've been given lots of chances to give up, throw in the towel, and look for day jobs. But something keeps us at it.

I can see that this blog is going to be less than perfect, a chance to let me air some of the frustrations I have had with aspects of community and belonging or not belonging as the case may be.

and with time constraints being as they are, I am sure that the blogs compsosed with 4 small boys underfoot will be less than stellar quality. I beg your pardon in advance.